The Letter L

 

for the Loomis Levys. 

For those of you who know us, me moved to California in 2016. My mom had passed away, Elliott was retiring and after meeting the first born, the day after she was born, I was in love and really felt my heart hurting when we left California (for a visit). That December we handed our keys to the new owners of our house on the ocean and without a smidgeon of a doubt, got in the RV with Cloey and Zoey and drove to California. After a few months we found our dream house and made best friends. The best part was our role in Eliana's life. When asked recently how many times she had been to our house her answer was a billion. We had a playroom for her. 

Jessica and Arik did not have a nanny at that point. We were at their house often to watch Eliana or to have fun with her. I remember a gift I gave Jessica and that was a cute wooden container to put her teeth in when they fell out. I never saw it or any gift we gave them and perhaps because they did not meet her upscale standards, they were thrown away. Whatever happened to the wind clock? And the coasters? And everything else.  We were there emptying the dishwasher, tidying up the kitchen and anything else that was needed. We fed Eliana but there was never any kind of dinner for us. 

In any case she and I had a good relationship. She told me things about Arik's mother, his sister and even their relationship. When they hired Duneau our roles, of course lessened but we were still there at the drop of the hat. We canceled any plans we had to be with the kids. By this time Mikayla was born. We were at the hospital the day she was born as well as when Dylan was born.

 I am not sure what set her off. She told me she trusted us to drive because her mother was a terrible driver. She was also a terrible mother and shared with us that other parents called her to tell her she was an awful parent. She was abusive -emotionally and I know the big and little kids were spanked. 

Dylan was born literally the day before the Covid lockdown. They had moved from Sacramento to Loomis - 9.2 miles away. We did not get to know him although I have lots of pictures with us and him including when Jessica called and told us his passport hadn't arrived, and can we take him for 4 or 5 days? Of course we could. 

The break was perhaps when I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I did not get a text, a call, nothing even after my surgery. When Elliott wrote to her suggesting she ask me how my surgery was, she said it was too much to ask. Seriously.

That perhaps was the start of us not being able to see the kids for a year. We knew she was rigid but can an 8 pm bedtime be 8:30 if there was no school the next day? Or could Mikayla have hot chocolate? After all Karen, Jessica's mother, gave her hot chocolate and did other forbidden things. 

The four of us went to therapy for 6 weeks and we really thought we made progress. What did I want? To go on a vacation with them like Karen and Randy did. We did not fit in with them. Our values, our looks, were very different so we didn't look like they did and when Arik sold his businesses things got even worse. Her stoicism turned into downright meanness. 

And then we got a call, and we moved back to the east coast. We are sure Arik and Jessica were relieved that they did not have to worry about taking care of us as we were aging. So, we moved. We flew out to see the kids and spoke to them on Sunday mornings unless they were on a trip, which was frequent. The calls continued. Eight months later we flew out again. We picked up the kids from school Tuesday and I was attacked by Ms Leah who told me Dylan had bit someone. We were going to go to target, but I figured Jessica would want a consequence. I kick myself that I just didn't say talk to his mother. Jessica said over the phone while we were in target and they were in Peru that he doesn't bite or hit, both girls were quick to say "not true." We were also reprimanded that we were not supposed to take all three kids at the same time. Why?? because the babysitter had to get paid. Huh?? these are multi-millionaires, and they can't pay the babysitter for 9 hours while we were there from the east coast. We would have paid her if we knew how very serious an infraction that was! Dylan was crying when we left school. We were not going to break the three up and I told Jessica that. She said the babysitter called her (in Peru) crying because she is meek and did not know how to tell us we couldn't take the three.

If a babysitter calls crying, I do wonder if she is mature enough to take care of three children. By that time, they had gone through so many nannies I cannot imagine what she is like to work for, and the babysitter was probably more scared of Jessica than us!!

We were supposed to leave Thursday night. Yes, we flew 2500 miles for 2 1/2 days with the kids. Jessica had also told me that we were ok taking the three from 6 to 8pm. WTF 6 hours?? Anyway, Jessica and Arik changed their flight times and literally flew into the house and checked the house. Why I have no idea!! what Arik was looking for but neither one said hello or spoke to us. At that point it was clear we were not welcome and waited outside for Linna and Michael. We went to their house until it was time to go to the airport.

The following Sunday during what was supposed to be our time with the kids (1/2 hour on the dot) we were told by Jessica that she would have nothing to do with us, and she would not help the kids on Sundays or at any time to contact us. If they wanted to they could. They are 5, 8 and 9. 

We couldn't even wish Mikayla happy birthday yesterday. Where do the kids think we are? What are they being told. Forget about emotional abuse to us what about the kids? It has been two months and calls, texts, etc. even contacting Karen and Randy go unanswered (Randy answers us but is no help). 

If you have experience with this or are an attorney, please leave a comment. This was written very quickly so sorry about any typos or anything that doesn't make sense. Thanks for reading, Jo