Recipes for living, loving and laughing:Jo, Elliott, Cloey & Zoey's adventures

This was written in 2005. I hope it answers some questions.  My husband and I got married close to 20 years ago. My daughters were almost 3 and a little over 5. They took to him immediately and even told my parents that they liked him and thought he was cute! I was a step mom to his son who had loyalty issues to his own mother and never bonded with me. My girls bonded with my husband in spite of some very difficult times. What they tell us now is they see us as any other family. We had some problems and bad times; but we also had a lot of good times. They do not, much to my surprise, hold him hostage for those bad times. Their biological father was fairly absent. He sent me the requisite very low child support on time and visited them once a week usually. There were many weeks he missed visits or was late. He never knew who their doctor was or dentist. He never brought them to a school event; never saw them play soccer or volleyball claiming he was out of town wor...

In spite of the fact that so many families have one parent in the household there is still a lot of stigma around being a single mom. According to the "Marital Status and Living Arrangements: March 1998 Update" by Terry A. Lugaila at the US Census Bureau: "As of March 1998 Current Population Survey, 19.8 million children under the age of 18 lived with one parent-this translates to 27.7 percent of all children under the age of 18." When I first was divorced I didn't hear the words "broken home" or dysfunctional all that much. They seem to have become catch-all phrases in the last 20 years when the rate of divorce became high. When I first heard Oprah Winfrey use the word broken home, I was appalled. She of all people should know better! When I read the term in an article by Marian Wright Edelman, founder and president of the Children's Defense Fund (CDF), who had been an advocate for disadvantaged Americans for her entire professional career...

This was a very popular article on epinions written many years ago but still relevant. We started traveling with our children when they were 3, 5 and 8. These were some of the tricks I had up my sleeve. 1. They will certainly fill a backpack with their favorite toys, games, books, etc. I bought "surprises." They would consist of inexpensive items like play dough; silly putty; new coloring books or connect-the-dot type books; and a couple of the small travel games - travel checkers, travel trivia depending on the children’s ages. In the new world, you would have to adjust to the days of paper and pencils! 2. I would get rolls of nickels, dimes or quarters. The price increased as they got older. I don't believe in punishing bad behavior (unless it is harmful to someone else, property or the child himself); I believe in ignoring it and rewarding behavior that is appropriate. Based on that philosophy, the children would get, let's say a nickel when they were young...

Jo wrote this many years ago. We hope it helps in some way. When I got divorced I thought of it as a solution and not "the" problem. In a lot of relationships, I believe, divorce is the solution to a problem. Before you read more or dismiss this because you don’t believe in divorce, think about that sentence. Many people think that children with divorced parents are doomed thus we have a notion that divorce is THE PROBLEM. Have you ever spoken to an adult who has said “I wish my parents had gotten divorced years ago. I hated the fighting, I hated the tension, or I hated the silence?” Are there better times in a child’s life to get divorced? Some think so. Some say that when children are very young it is easier on them because they haven’t known a 2-parent family for long and others say it is easier when they are older because they understand what is going on better than, let’s say a 4-year old. There are pros and cons to both. I believe neither time has to be a bad...