The story that has to be told

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This was mostly written by Elliott. The year has taken its toll. When we were traveling to move to CA, he said "what if we get estranged?" I was baffled because it was unthinkable to me. His inner being sensed it could happen. My mom did not speak to my aunt for 10 years. We do not have 10 years. We are missing so much even it is on facetime. 

It has been a year since Arik and Jessica terminated contact between Eliana, Mikayla and Dylan and their paternal grandparents.  This is the story that needs to be shared with the children. (I will add that I know this situation has escalated. There are support groups on Facebook for estranged family members. This story might work for others if published in a magazine.

-May 2015.  Elliott, Arik’s dad, was in Sacramento for his regularly scheduled visit with his son.  Arik introduced his dad to Jessica, whom he met in Dec 2014.  The couple shared that they were pregnant.  Elliott called Joanne, Arik’s stepmother for the last 30+ years.  We celebrated the great news. 

-November 2015. Joanne and Elliott, who were living in Massachusetts, returned to California for the baby shower.  There was going to be a grandchild in the family!

-January 2016. Eliana was born. Joanne and Elliott drove their RV to a campground in West Sacramento, arriving one day after the birth.  They spent most of the spring and summer enjoying countless hours caring for, being with and falling in love with Eliana.  We made the huge decision to relocate to California!

-Dec 2016. Sold Massachusetts' house, packed up the RV and returned to the campground in West Sacramento.  

-Feb 2017. Bought house in Lincoln, California.

-July 2017. Mikayla was born. Loved spending time with and caring for the two granddaughters in the dedicated playroom and bedroom in their house.  

-Feb 2020. Dylan was born.

-2020.  COVID! Being seniors with comorbidities, we minimized exposure to the grandchildren.

-2021.  Resumed spending time with and caring for the grandchildren in the dedicated playroom and bedroom in Nana and Papa’s house, including 4 days with Dylan when his passport delay prevented him from accompanying his parents and sisters on a trip.

-Jan 2022.  Joanne was diagnosed with breast cancer. Not a word of support from Arik or Jessica, even after a plea from Elliott for just a phone call! Very disrespectful.

-Feb 2022. Sheera was diagnosed with ovarian cancer.  No support or concern.  Who are these people?

-June 2022. Joanne completed radiation.  We drove the RV to New York to be close to Sheera. 

-Oct 2022.  Returned to California.

-Nov 2022 to Mar 2023. Therapy scheduled by Arik and Jessica for the four of us.  Jessica apologized for “living in a bubble” during the cancer times.  We learned how some of our grandparenting behaviors were unacceptable to them.

-Jan 2023.  During visit to New York, we bought a house in New Jersey with intent to maintain two homes.

-April 2023. Occupied New Jersey house and established New Jersey residency.

-November 2023.  We returned to California and decided that it was financially and physically too difficult to keep both houses.

-Apr 2024.  Sold California house and returned to New Jersey. We started weekly one-half hour Google Meets with grandchildren. 

-Aug 2024.  Visited grandchildren in California.

-May 2025. Visited grandchildren in California. 

-May 18, 2025.  Contact with grandchildren terminated by their parents because the grandparents “disrespected” Jessica by violating the requirement to take only two children at a time away from the nanny from 3-6pm during their three-day visit.  Who abuses children and elders like this?   Cutting off contact with grandkids because the grandparents, who hadn’t seen the kids in 8 months, didn’t want to leave a crying 5-year-old behind while taking the other two out to dinner (especially after it was reported to the grandparents that the 5-year-old bit someone after school). Who are these people?

Jo's addition. The year has been hell for us. Elliott is having a heart ablation and at almost 79 that is not good. We see friends dying and talking about their grandchildren and cannot understand how this couple, who have everything, took their children away from us. We were so important in everyone's life. Is it literally just a matter of "they don't need us anymore and don't want to have to be responsible for aging issues?" Elliott told Arik that we won't need his money so no need to worry. At one time Jessica said we could live in their guest house. How did we go from that to this?

Any help??

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